Weekend plans

Ahh halloween...time for hay rides, trick-or-treating, and wienie roasts....which I think is what hubby and I are doing this weekend....We were invited to a wienie roast at one of our friends houses...our friend does this every year the weekend before Halloween....the last time we went 2 years ago I got so stinkin drunk, in fact that was the last time I was drunk....Oh hubby and I have drank a little in the last 2 years but that was the last time I was really drunk...if I'm not mistaken I ended the night by barfing on my shoes....gross....anyway I think I am ready to tie on a good one again.....We will be kid free this weekend so why not....after working all of this overtime I feel like I deserve it....the only thing is I know if I do get drunk it will take me at least 2 days to recouperate from it....I am such a light weight.....When hubby and I went to the beach with my birth mother my oldest brother got me this stuff called Tilt....it's kind of like Red Bull mixed with beer without the beer taste...it tastes more like Red Bull....so anyway you get drunk without getting sleepy....I am kind of excited....I am ready to hang out with someone besides my family for a change....should be fun, I will post with all the juicy details.

My mother is a HAG

I finally talked to my adoptive mother last weekend...she works at our local motel....the same motel that my birth father stayed at when he was in town last weekend (no, he was not aware that she worked there, this is why we had him come out for breakfast every day they were here, so they would not run into each other) she said she saw his name in the books, so I am sure she was just calling to nose....I mean it has been since July since I have heard from her. She as usual pissed me off....she asked what I had been doing and I told her working...I asked her how everyone was and she informed me that my adoptive father went back to work(he works oversea's so when he goes back to work it means he will be gone for 6 months) she said that she dropped him off at the airport that morning....nice of you to let me know he was leaving and nice of him to call and tell me goodbye....In case you didn't notice the sarcasim obviously neither one of them let me know he was leaving.....I then asked how my grandmothers were doing....I knew that one was in a nursing home and the other in the hospital with a hurt toe, but of course my mother's sarcastic reply was "How do you think they are doing, one is in the hospital and the other in the nursing home"......hateful hag........I told her I knew that, I was just asking how they were doing......I have been working my ass off lately.....12 hr days.....I get off at 6:30 in the morning, drive home, get to bed usually between 8 and 9, then get up at 3p.m. to get ready to go back to work at 6p.m., and I have a 45 minute drive to get to and from work....so I have next to no time to do anything but work and help the kids with thier homework........This is why I have not been to visit either grandmother yet....not just because I don't feel like it.....Then my mother started in on my dogs....we used to breed Pit Bulls....we stopped breeding them when they started to ban them locally, besides you can't even sell them in the newspaper anymore....however we still have them.....and this is what my mother was bitching about....She said we need to take them and have them put to sleep somewhere....I told her I am not doing that....they are good dogs that have NEVER done anything to warrant putting them to sleep(I wonder if she would still be so dead set on us putting them to sleep if she had been in our house about 2 months ago when we had one die from a heat stroke...he died in my daughter's arms...she literally screamed when he died and she cried for over a week) however my mother would not let up and I finally got pissed off and told her "They are the same fuckin dogs we have had for 10 years and you never cared then so why all the sudden "concern" just because they talk on the news about how "vicious" they are....I'm not saying that some of them aren't.....however our's I don't think are....sure they are going to bark and growl and if they were not on log chains drilled into the ground they would probably bite you if you come in our yard UNANNOUNCED that does not constitute putting them to sleep....hello, they are supposed to be guard dogs, although my Shit-zu's are way more likely to bite you in the ass then our Pit Bulls are.....Besides if she was so fucking concerned then why did she wait 3 months to even fuckin call me and then only because she found out my birth father had come down to visit again....my mother is a HAG!!!

Time for sports

Ahh yes..It's that time of year when school activities are starting up...15 yr. Old springs on me last night that she has to have a sports physical for basketball....The kicker is that she has know about said physical for about 3 weeks which only gives me about a week to get it done....Which means I MUST find a new doctor now....I hate going to new doctors. But it must be done...15 yr old will only have the next 4 years to play so I am going to see to it that she can if she wants to...Oh, and 10 yr old has decided she wants to be a little league basketball cheerleader...Following in her mamma's footsteps....She does look so stinkin cute in that little uniform....I am excited about my children's upcoming sports ventures...It will give us all something to do. I think it is good for kids to be involved in sports and such...Seems to keep them out of trouble.

Awsome dad, stupid sister

Well my birth father made it in this weekend for a visit...my sister of course pissed me off as usual....dad arrived Friday afternoon at about 2:30...he came on out to our house as soon as he got into town and he brought his new bike with him. He and my hubby took them out for a short ride to town and back with the kids...I made homemade chicken and noodles and we visited until about 8:00...After he left I called my sister to make sure she was going to come down on Saturday and to ask her to bring back the pictures of our birth mother that she had. Stupid ass she is, she says to me "I didn't think they wanted those back"....fuckin liar, she knew that they wanted them back. But what really pissed me off was after i talked to her Friday night she calls back and leaves a message on my cell phone that says "Oh by the way, If you are going to be smoking in the house I am not staying, I will only stay for an hour or two if you all are smoking because I am not going to put my baby at risk being in that smoky house"..............Okay, first off, It's my fucking house. Second, Hello I smoked when I was pregnant, not second hand smoke, first hand.....now I'm am not condoning it, I am just saying that your baby is not going to be fuckin retarded by you the mother breathing in a little second hand smoke.....not to mention my sister fucked up while she was there and said that she had gone to a keroke bar a couple weeks ago....correct me if I am wrong but they smoke in those do they not? I think it was just her way of trying to monopolize the situation, which if she wasn't so stupid might work....she even thinks that she can't eat ANY fish, including tuna while she is pregnant, if tuna is so bad then why do they give it to you when you are on WIC.... she had also told me that she had some kind of lactating class on Saturday so she was planning on being there at about 1:00, well when I talked to her Friday night she tells me that her class was not until next week but she was going to sleep in on Saturday so she still would not be there until 1:00.....must be nice....I would have liked to sleep in too.....or maybe had a little bit of fuckin help cooking dinner Saturday.....She showed up right at 1:00, just in time to eat dinner and then after we finished eating she went in on the couch and took a fuckin nap.....I swallowed my tongue and did not smoke in MY house while she was there and thank god she finally left at about 7:00 and she did not come back on Sunday....She is so fuckin selfish....I can't wait until she has this kid....Man I hope it gives her hell, she deserves it.....Anyway, Sunday morning we asked dad and his wife to come for breakfast since they were going to have to leave at around noon to head back home....we ate breakfast and sat and visited until it was time for them to leave.....we said our goodbyes and after they left I went in the house to clean up after our breakfast.....underneath my father's plate was $400......He knew hubby and I are both driving on expired tags....and he also knew that I would not ask for help.....I love my dad.....So my friends this morning as soon as I get off work I am paying my personal property taxes and getting my cars liscensed....yeah!!!!......Thank you dad!

Religion

My friends and I got into a discussion about religion tonight at work....we were all talking about our very different views on the subject...for example, I don't believe everything that is in the bible....I believe a good deal of it, but not all of it. I am also not a fan of organized religion or going to church....that's not to say that I have never gone...my mother used to drag me there every Sunday, and even with all that church she still is convinced I am going to hell I'm sure....anyway this apparently pissed off one of the girls whom is relatively new to our break table....She made the comment "Nobody has any faith anymore".....Not true you narrow minded dumbass....I have alot of faith in God....I just don't have alot of faith in people.....I think there are alot of people that currently go to church that are still going to go hell and I think there are alot of people that don't go to church that will definately be sitting right beside Jesus in heaven....I don't think any preacher has the right to tell me that if i don't to this or that I am going to hell....remember "Judge not lest ye be judged"......yeah I've read the bible too dumbass....That's not to say that I have not had both of my children baptised in church....It made me feel better about thier future when I'm gone....however as soon as they were both baptised we all quit going....I am not a faithless person. Everyone needs something to believe in....I'm quite sure that if you asked a Muslim or a Jew or a Christian or an Amish person if thier religion is the accurate truth every single one of them would say yes....are any of them wrong....I don't think so....It's not what you call God or how you worship that is important....It's what's in your heart that matters....At least that is my opinion.

Pissed off

You have been really pissing me off lately....I think you are an immature freakin jerk....You act like a child....No that's not accurate because even my children don't act as fucking stupid as you do. When I come into the break room and you have your feet in the only available chair at our table and don't move them I know you are doing it intentionally to piss me off however I will not give you the satisfaction of seeing how spitting mad you are making me.....Not to mention I am so fuckin sick of hearing how broke you are but in the next sentence you tell us all about how much money you spent at the bar last weekend....You just got your driver's license back after your second DWI....You are a stupid fucking moron

Crunch time

I had to go in to work early tonight for overtime, when I was able to take a break and check my messages I discovered one from my birth father and one from my birth sister. My birth father is now coming to visit THIS weekend instead of next weekend apparently. He called to make sure that it was okay. My sister's message was much along the same lines. My sister did say that she would finally get all of her baby shit I hauled back from Tennessee for her. She also said she was thinking about spending the night Saturday. I have already called hubby to warn him....Be nice to my sister. My sister drives hubby nuts, and in his defense my sister is quite selfish and materialistic. I'm sure that will subside a little in about 2 months when she has her baby......Now I am in panic mode though because I don't know what the hell I am going to feed everyone. I bought a turkey to fix on Saturday and I am thinking about a big pot of homemade chicken and noodles for Friday night....I could probably do lunch meat and chips for a light lunch before turkey on Saturday.....But what to do about Sunday.......And my house, ohhh my house....I have slacked off a little this past weekend which means that now I have got to clean the kids bedrooms, make sure their sheets and crap are washed in case my sister does spend the night Saturday, not to mention the now 8 or 9 loads of laundry I will have to do before they get here, and all of this on top of working 12 hours a day this week.
I am looking forward to seeing my dad...This will only be the second time I have seen him....We talk almost every weekend on the phone, but he lives 8 hours away so we can't exactly visit each other all the time you know.....But I give him one hell of a lot of credit for coming.....My adoptive parents only live about 20 minutes away and they have not been to my house in almost 2 years and I have not talked to them since June.....fucking sad parents they are.........The thing is I know that they are the ones missing out on seeing their daughter and their ONLY granddaughter grow up....So why do I feel so fucking guilty?????

Weekend happenings

I talked to my birth mother again this weekend, I was telling her about my dislike for Iodine Contrast (anaphylactic shock) and she told me that my oldest younger brother (did that make sense?) has had the same exact thing happen to him...this is also the same brother that has had sinus surgery (I have as well)....what scares the hell out of me is this, it seems I have inherited most of my health problems from my maternal side of the family....my mother also has problems with chronic bladder infections, but the part that is scaring me the most is that my mother just finished I think 42 weeks of chemotherapy for colon cancer. It was her 3rd round with cancer, and she is only 52, I have also had precancerous polyps removed off my colon 6 years ago. Since then I must go and have a repeat colonoscopy done every 3 years for the rest of my life...the doctor's said I was at a high risk for developing colon cancer....and this was long before I had found my birth family or discovered any of my medical history....even though I complain profusely about said colonoscopy, I now belive my life depends on it.

I cleaned house all freakin day Saturday and I still have about 6 or7 loads of laundry to do and I never made it to cleaning the kids bedrooms which means that next weekend I must tackel thier rooms since my birth father is coming to visit the weekend after next and my house must be clean....okay it doesn't have to be clean, but I will feel alot better once it is

Sunday hubby and I went for a ride on the Harley with a couple of our friends, I did not really want to go but hubby wanted me to so we could spend some time together...isn't that sweet. All I really wanted to do though was work on my laundry and wait for the Chiefs game to come on but once we met up with our friends and started riding I had fun...even though my nose is so freakin stopped up from all the dust blowing around from the damn farmer's out cutting the fields.

Crappy friends strike again

I talked to one of my friends that I have not seen or talked to in about a month the other day...I called her.....The first thing she said was "could you get me some boxes from your work, we are moving again".....There's a big surprise....This person moves like every 6 months it seems like....What irritates me is that she did not even take the time to ask me how I was doing or what was going on in my life or anything of that sort, our conversation was all about her...All 5 minutes of it....Because you see, once she had asked for said boxes then all of the sudden she was extremely busy....Too busy to talk of course....She asked if I would call her back later...I said I would but I didn't....Nor have I gotten her freakin boxes for her.....What I should have said was what did you do with the other 50 or so I have gotten you over the last couple of years....You would think as much as she moves by now she would have learned to save the freakin things, wouldn't you?....However will I actually tell crappy friend any of this...No....I'm such a puss.

Time for an ass beatin'

Yesterday Hubby and I went out to feed the dogs...we came back into the house through our bedroom door instead of the kitchen door we left through, thereby "sneaking" into the house...when we entered my children were as usual arguing....apparently 15 yr old had taken 10 yr old's new earings and would not give them back....because what we heard was 10 yr old screaming at 15 yr old "Give me back my earings...Give me back my earings now...GIVE ME BACK MY EARINGS YOU STUPID CUNT"...........I was shocked....I gasped and looked at hubby and in the space of the 2 seconds it took for me to react, hubby was already up and in the kitchen beating some ass.....then I proceeded to beat some ass.....The really bad thing is I think 10 yr old learned that one from your's truly....she must have heard me when I was bitching to hubby about bitch doctor that would not give me my test results.....I feel like a crappy mother.....At 10 yrs old she should not even know words like that let alone say them.

Homecoming

15 year old went to her first high school homecoming. She looked beautiful. It amazes me how big she is getting.....And it worries me. She will be 16 in about 6 months. I am scared to death at the prospect of her being mobile.....Without the eyes of mom and dad on her. She already thinks she knows it all. If she acts anything like I did at her age....I am in BIG trouble....God, I wonder now if this is how my parents felt when they were raising me....No wonder they don't have anything to do with me now. It doesn't help that I can't trust 15 yr. Old as far as I can pick her up and throw her. But then again can you really trust any teenager with raging hormones and a pack of mischievous friends...........I have a feeling that the next five years are not going to be fun....and then I get to turn around and do it all over with 10 yr old.

Puppies are here!

Our Shit-zu finally had her puppies....8 of them. Six boys and two girls. They are so stinkin' cute. I can't wait until they are big enough to walk around. I am trying to talk hubby into keeping one of them. One of the boy puppies was born without a tail....which is one of their distinguishing traits. I want to call him bobby. But money talks and if someone wants little Bobby....then Bobby is gone......as long as it's to a good home.

Still sad

Well, I did not make it to my friend's daughter's visitation. Nor did I go to the funeral. I did not find out about the date and time of the visitation until it was to late, and I think unless you were best friends or something with the deceased then the funeral is for family. I feel bad. I should have tried harder to find out the arrangements. I did call my friend on Sunday but I got her machine...I left a message. I also sent a card with $20 in it. My friend is now going to be raising her grandson...I know she could use the money....I wish I could have sent more but I am VERY broke, but I am not going to whine about that now.....Suddenly money does not seem that important as long as I still have my children and my husband. My heart is just breaking for my friend. As a mother myself I can not imagine the pain she is going through. Apparently she was murdered at her father's house while he was at home in bed sleeping. The strange thing is (well at least I think it is strange) her father said he heard the two of the loudly arguing late that night but decided not to get in the middle of it and went on to bed. The following morning he got up and went on to work. He did not even go into her room to check and see if everything was alright. Not that that would have changed anything, by then they were both long gone in one way or another. I know this kind of thing happens all the time......but let me tell you, it is a lot different when you personally know the people involved. So everyone help me say a prayer for my friend and her grandson who is now going to grow up without his mother OR father.